Tuesday, January 26, 2010

An old favorite updated

Anyone remember this? Still not sure why it was liked so much...







Product list will be added when I wake up! Bedtime. :)

Monday, January 25, 2010

Bright MIdnight Makeup Tutorial





Products Used:

Eyes
Untitled Paint (MAC)
M13 Hotpot (Coastal Scents)
M08 Hotpot (Coastal Scents)
SmoothBlue Technakhol Liner (MAC)
Deep Truth Eyeshadow (MAC)
Blue Pigment (MAC)
Blue Noir eyeshadow (MAC)
Flushed Eyeshadow (Prestige)
Zero 247 Liner (Urban Decay)
Luxe Black Faux Lashes (Shu Uemura)
Folie Eyeshadow (MAC)

Face
Ginseng Moist cream (Mario Badsecu)
8 Hour Skin Protectant (Elizabeth Arden)
HD Foundation (MUFE)
Select Moisturecover Concealer (MAC)
M13 Hotpot (Coastal Scents)
Taupe Blush (MAC)
Sunsparked Pearl Beauty Powder (MAC)

Lips
Little Tease Lipliner (MAC)
#505A (wet & Wild)

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Anti-Valentine's Day Makeup








Products used:

Eyes
Hush Cream Color Base (MAC) with fluffy brush (217 by MAC)
Shimmertime pigment (MAC) with flat, fluffy brush (239 by MAC) & angled brush (266)
Blackberry and Dovefeather eyeshadows (MAC) with dome shaped fluffy brush (224 by MAC)
Folie eyeshadow (MAC) with angled brush (266 by MAC)
#7 Brown Lashes (MAC)
Dressed Browset (MAC)

Face
HD Foundation (MUFE)
Taupe Blush (MAC) with angled contour brush
Sunsparked Pearl beauty Powder (MAC) with blush brush

Lips
Currant lipliner (MAC)
Sexie lipstick (MAC)
Roccoco lipstick (MAC)

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Identity & Fame

I should be editing videos but I just got home from Border's and felt compelled to write. I am, and always have been, for some reason, someone who people just talk to randomly. They'll tell me their life stories or share with me what they're going through. True, at times I ask (like in some of my videos) because I am very interested in human beings, the mind, how it operates and individual experiences. But what I'm addressing are moreso completely random interactions whether at a bus stop, a store, a plane - wherever. The interactions always take place with complete strangers who will jsut start talking to me. Perhaps because I rarely have a real sense of time, and an interest in people, I always listen and engage the person.

I was looking for a new tiny notepad to carry with me and this woman asked if I had good eyesight, and could I help here determine the price of an item. I did and she responded by stating that it was so cute but not something she needed. I agreed and she helped to bring me back to the realization that I have 3 tiny notepads and don't need another. I commented that she was right and too many people fill their lives with "things". She told me to count my pennies because they add up. I again, agreed and shared that I was currently in the midst of cleansing process and in the past year had already gotten rid of at least 15 bags of clothes and "things" to goodwill.

She started telling me how goodwill is a horrible organization, extremely overpriced and is no good to people like her. I explained that to my knowledge, while she may view items as being overpriced, I was under the assumption that all "profit" made was used to help people - how could that be bad?

I won't continue the conversation but when I mentioned that when getting rid of old coats and such, my mom and I give them to people on the street rather than Goodwill. She then showed me her tattered and worn jacket beneath another thin jacket. It was only then that I noticed the laundry cart behind her filled to the brim with god knows what and covered with garbage bags to protect it from getting wet. I hadn't realized she was homeless. I engaged in conversation with her for nearly an hour but I mainly just listened. She expressed how oddly enough she used to be a very compassionate person but since becoming down on her luck, she had no sympathy for anyone anymore. She realized hot selfish people were, how those around her were addicted to drugs and took advantage of people (including her) regardless of her attempts to help them. She explained that the hospitals didn't help her, only "illegals", that there were all these programs to help drug addicts and help them get off the streets, but none for an old retired teacher. She told me story after story about how she had let one woman borrow her fleece because the woman had been freezing, yet the woman stole it from her. How another had praised her for actually caring about them, only to then later throw up on the bench that everyone knows she sleeps on. How she tried and tried to help people but always got the short end of the stick.

At some point I asked where she had taught. She looked uncomfortable and told me she had created a school for her son because he was extremely gifted. I asked how many students, what grades she taught etc and she became increasingly uncomfortable and I let it drop. Over the course of the conversation I made only a few remarks but at the end she thanked me for listening and for the food bank information I had given her and told me I was very insightful for my age.

I walked away from the conversation with this clear understanding of just how lost some people are. How out of touch they are with themselves and their inner light and how they cling to identities because of the lack of consciousness. I still have my moments of ego driven rage - don't get me wrong, it's a process. But this woman was clinging an identity of helping people. She created and was clinging to her identity of being a teacher. When I asked more questions about that, I mentioned she got uncomfortable. She did so because I don't believe she was really a "teacher" the way we think of them - in a school teaching students. So I shook her identity. She couldn't justify it because she wasn't confident in her perception of herself as a teacher. She helps people to get back appreciation for her deeds. She stated so herself. True, everyone wants validation and appreciation. Well, almost everyone. When you truly appreciate yourself, there is no need, no ego driven desire to be appreciated by any other being. You simply exist at peace with yourself.


This video kindddd of relates, though not really. But it's a really good video. It moreso relates to the contagiousness I talked about in an earlier post.



So then I get home. My mom asks what books I bought. One is a dictionary of all ingredients used in cosmetics - their purpose, where they come from etc. From there my mom tells me "I don't know why you feel the need to share so many personal details about your life. You blog about your sexuality and religion (she obviously saw my personal channel) and that's not going to help you get famous. If anything it will hurt you. Look at any actress or comedian - they don't share their sexuality or personal details about their life until after they're famous." I literally laughed. Why? Because I never said I wanted to be "famous" and I don't know where she got that idea. Yes, one day it'd be nice to have a cover of Vogue (me having done the makeup of course) but I hardly connect that with wanting fame. If anything I believe Youtube has allowed me to connect with a greater amount of people, but from what most people have told me, they like my videos because I'm not shoving products down peoples throats and I'm not concealing who I am, projecting this false persona. Again, my mom disagreed and stated that in order to try to "be someone" often times that's what you have to do. "But I'm not trying to be "someone". I'm just being myself." And I left it at that.

I had a conversation with Prasand awhile back about people who are in the "spotlight" and later read "The Winner Stands Alone" by Paulo Coelho. It is my belief and opinion that people who seek fame are driven by the ego, the need for attention and validation. Then there are those who in my opinion, though may be considered A list, supersede the list. These are people who seem to just stumble upon fame - they aren't seeking it out, it just kind of happens. Not all A list celebrities are included in what I'll call the A+ list for now. But those in the A+ list are, I believe, so much more in the spotlight because their presence and actions are meant to be a sort of example for others. Whether people love them or hate them, there's something to be said for these people.

For example...I'm sure anyone reading this is thinking "Oprah!" - yes, I personally include her in the A+ list She has helped millions of people and you can tell does so because she wants to, not to market herself as someone doing good for humanity. But she's too easy. Angelina Jolie is a perfect example. The world at large was in awe of her beauty yet shocked by vials of blood she and Billy Bob wore around their necks. They were disgusted by her affection towards her brother and people took sides and judged her in regards to the Brad Pitt/Jennifer Aniston ordeal. However, she is someone who has always lived her life doing as she wanted, saying what she wanted, being herself, despite critics. She carries with her this incredible almost mystifying energy. As a single woman, she adopted her first child and proceeded to do countless amounts of charity work in other countries. Because it was something she felt she needed to do and wanted to do. It wasn't a one time deal; "let's go entertain the troops in Iraq" and market this image of helping people while being pro-american. I'm not putting down people that have done that. Helping others is always a good thing, whether it's to boost your own image or not, the outcome is the same. But there's just something different about doing something purely from your
heart. Ashton Kutcher is another example IMO. I already touched on lady gaga, who I believe is another.

I could go on and on but fame is a funny thing. If you seek it out, and one only does so from an ego driven place, it will break you over and over again until you're honest with yourself. Which is definitely a good thing, but as a society we put celebrities in general on pedestals. And we become obsessed with their "scandals". People tend to apply this god(dess) like complex to them, when in reality they're simply human. And I believe if more were honest and open, whether in interviews, or simply in everyday life, there would be less "scandals" as more people would see them clearly for who they are and an example of "live your life openly and be true to your inner self" would be spread more readily. I somewhat lost my train of thought so I'll end this, but I'd like to hear your thoughts. :)

Purple Orange Combo







Products used:

Eyes
Primer Potion (urban Decay)
Coral Eyeshadow (MAC)
Double Dose Blush - Sunshine (Senna Cosmetics)
Persimmon eyeshadow (Yaby)
BL001 (yaby)
Hotpot #S19 (Coastal Scents)
Pop Iris Liquidlast liner (MAC)
UV Mascara (MAC)
Violet Underground Eye Khol (MAC)
#631 eyeshadow (Yaby)
Yeyo 247 liner (Urban Decay)
Swiss Chocolate eyeshadow (MAC)
Saddle eyeshadow (MAC)

Face
Embryolisse
HD Elixer (MUFE)
Select Moisture Cover concealer (MAC)
#754 Nobara Stick Foundation (Shu Uemura)
-0 White Foundation (Face Atilier)
Blossoming Blushcreme (MAC)
Peaches Blush (MAC)
Tahitian Sand Beauty Powder (MAC)

Lips
Cranberry lipliner (MAC)
Walnut Lipliner (MAC)
Coral Bora Bora Lipstick (Milani)
persimmon eyeshadow (Yaby)
Sunshine blush (Senna Cosmetics)
Wonderstruck lustreglass (MAC)

Charity raffle to help Haiti

Another raffle!! Yes, yes more makeup tutorials will be up soon, I have 4 recorded, 1 will be up later tonight BUT there's a lot more important things in the world and life than makeup. Sooooo here's the deal. The president of Maggie Bags wrote to me wanting to do another charity raffle - this time benefiting Haiti. You can choose whatever organization you want to donate to. I recommend Doctors Without Borders. Anyhow, this time, tickets are in the form of $1 donations. Same deal as last time. make your donation and then forward me the email.



Maggie Bags has donated 20 "Totes of Many Colors" aka "The Everything Tote" seen here with Maggie herself:


I will draw winners on February 5th and 20 of you will win one these totes. Some will be multi=color, others will be solid - you get what you get, but either way, it's a great bag and very useful!!

Soooo go get to donating and send me those emails at makeupbyrisa@yahoo.com

Friday, January 22, 2010

Waiting

I've been attempting to upload a video for the past few hours. Youtube apparently doesn't want to work with me because it's failed and aborted the upload several times. I'm crossing my fingers on this time, hoping it goes up. In the meantime, I decided to write about an "aha!" moment that I had earlier tonight.Well, maybe not so much of an "Aha!" moment, but simply further confirmation of something I had already suspected/known.

Remember how in this blog entry I mentioned that parents (or adults more generally) certainly don't know everything? Well I was watching 20/20 with my mom and they replayed the interview Barbra Walters did with Lady Gaga. Now, a few nights ago in one of my many bouts of insomnia, I began to read Nicola Formichetti's blog. For those of you who don't know, he's Lady Gaga's stylist. I would LOVE to work with him. In any case, I was reading back further and further as I only discovered his blog about a month ago. He has various Gaga related posts including videos. She is an artist I've been aware of (who hasn't) but I never paid her much serious mind until her performance at the VMA's. Even after, I appreciated her art but never dove further into caring about who she was, what she was about etc. Perhaps partially because I lived through the era of pre-packaged talent that could sing (maybe) but their image and what they say, sing etc was mostly controlled by their labels and publicists. And I don't care much for people who are cautious in life. That say what "should be said" and wear what "should be worn" to sell more albums.

So I watched an interview of hers with someone from MTV- John someone. She explained (and some of you probably already knew this - what can I say, I'm late!) that her image is what it is because she wants it to be that way. She basically lives and breathes art. She felt like a freak growing up because she didn't fit in and wants to be a rolemodel for people to be who they are. If they want to be what the majority of society would consider "a freak", then that's okay. Do it. Be you. She also mentioned she works purely off of intuition and "visions" - or something along those lines. And everything she envisions she writes down and puts into action. Everytime, it's a success. Yet she's learned that if she ignores an intuitive urge and doesn't act on it, the "visions" become less clear/strong. I'm totally rephrasing everything by the way from memory.

Excuse my language, but how fucking cool is she. After hearing that interview I just have so much more respect for her. She is a true artist and a real, conscious human being. She is someone who "gets" the big picture in life. Back to 20/20, she reiterated the statement about wanting people to feel liberated to be themselves. At which point, after pointing out how mature she was for a 23 year old, my mom says "Oh, but there's the kid in her." I responded with "what?", not understanding what my mom meant by that statement. "There's her immaturity showing - it's her age."

Come again? This statement was made at the beginning of the interview so I waited until it was over to ask my mom to elaborate and this is what she said, "She said she's trying to teach people to be themselves. As if people need teaching."

I began to reply "Mom, she's very aware of the fact she has young fans."
"Yes Risa obviously, she's young herself"
"But mom, do you know how many people exist on this planet that are NOT truly themselves at their essence? How many kids do you think want to do something or be someone but don't because of either their parents or friends or whatever. Furthermore, there's even more adults who aren't truly themselves because they live life in fear."
"Oh Risa, stop! Melody and I both agreed that she sounded very immature making a statement"

I didn't even bother debating because I realized just how "out of it" she is. Personally, as I may have mentioned previously I've been on a bit of a "spirtual quest" for the last 2 years or so, but really only making much headway in the last 8 months. Only recently did I come to truly understand some of the conversations I've had with my friend Prasand. (follow him on twitter if you want - very insightful/interesting being - @Prasand) Many times he explained to me that just because I want to share something, doesn't mean it should be shared, that it could destroy a person, leaving their world in ruins if they're not ready to hear it.

So why address it on a public blog? Because I believe the things that I write about will resonate with you if you're meant to and ready to hear them. I touch on things on a very general level. You either can relate or you can't. And it is my belief that if you're someone who is not ready to hear such things, you'll simply reject it as my mom does. Which is fine.

Back to the conversation and Lady Gaga. She is someone who is very much in touch with her being, or soul. Those intuitive "visions" are purely her essence at it's core driving her forward. She has learned to tune out the voice of her mind, or her ego. And I don't just believe, I KNOW that THAT is what she was getting at by wanting to encourage people to be themselves - not who they think they should be to please everyone else around them or because they're afraid. Which yes, I suppose could be seen as a "childish" statement as my mom said, but childish is a positive way.

Watch kids someday if you have the opportunity, whether you're a parent or not. They can teach you far more than you can teach them. They say what they want, uncensored. They do what they want, if allowed. If allowed to dress themselves, sure some may dress in ways we think are ridiculous but they're expressing themselves - who they are. Because they haven't yet learned "the rules" that society imposes upon us.

Lady Gaga's statement may have been "childish", but it was spoken by someone who is fully conscious and dare I say has reached Enlightenment. Because that ladies and gentleman is the big secret of life. So simple, yet so unbelievably difficult for so many people to do, Be Yourself. Silence the voice that is your ego, the voice that instills fear in you, and simply Be Yourself. Once you're on that path, life truly becomes a breeze. And just like in "The Alchemist", the universe seems to conspire to help you and things just fall into place.

-On a sidenote, I haven't yet finished "The Power of Now" but it's pretty good. I do find it a bit too repetitive, though I understand some people need repetition to "get" a concept. I like the question/answer format as it pretty much addresses any questions that come up while reading. One of the main points I've walked away with is that you can talk until you're blue in the face and want to help someone "see the light" but it probably won't do much good, especially if they're not ready to see it (my mom) So I've learned to stop bothering/debating as much and although I still struggle with accepting her as is because I want her to feel more inner peace the way I do, it's easier and more effective for me to just accept that it is what it is - she'll only reach that point when she's ready. The best thing I can do is continue to be myself and build up the strength of my consciousness. Because that is really the only effective way to help anyone. Inner light/peace radiates and can't help but be contagious.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Maggie Bags & Makeup Raffle for Charity



-Go here: http://donations.ebay.com/charity/charity.jsp?NP_ID=939

The page will look like this:

(Click the image to make it larger)


Select the amount you'd like to donate. Tickets are $2 each, so make sure the amount you are donating is an even number! Notice I did $16 instead of $15.

You will receive 2 emails once you complete payment. They will look like these:

(Again, click to make them larger)





Forward either one to me!! at MakeupByRisa@yahoo.com so I can enter your name into the raffle. I was mistaken in the video, the emails do NOT include your address. No worries - if you win, I'll will ask you for your addresses.

You may purchase as many tickets as you want. The more the better as you have more of a chance of winning PLUS this is going to a good cause AND you can use your donation as a tax deduction.

Onto the prizes!

Prize #1:




Maggie Bags Backpack (retails for $98)
MAC Good As Gold Pearlizer (retailed for $17)
MAC Viva Glam V lipstick (retails for $14)
MAC Bitter pan Eyeshadow (retails for $10)
MAC Jam Session Glitter (retailed for $14)
MAC Black Tied Eyeshadow (retails for $14)


Prize #2:




Maggie Bags Pink Tote (retails for $76)
MAC Venus Pan Eyeshadow (retails for $10)
MAC Softwash Grey Pigment (retailed for $18)
MAC Apripeach Pearlizer (retailed for $17)
MAC Sleepy Eyeshadow (retailed for $13.50)
MAC Magrittes Paint (retails for $16)


Prize #3:




Maggie Bags Chocolate and Pink Hobo (retails for $98(
MAC HUndred Degrees Pearlier (retailed for $17.50)
MAC Ricepaper Pan Eyeshadow (retails for $10)
MAC Living Pink Eyeshadow (retailed for $13.50)
DazzleRay Pigment (retailed for $18)
MAC Overtly Plum Lipstick (retailed for $14)


Prize #4: If you live in or near San Francisco or Manhattan, Brooklyn, the Bronx or Queens, I will come to YOU! I will do your makeup. We will talk and you can ask me anything and everything you want to know about how to best do your makeup for your face and then we will have a mini photoshoot. If you live in New York, this will need to take place sometime while I am out there February 11th-23rd

If you win this prize and you live elsewhere, we will have an hour and half (possibly longer as time seems to fly when I'm doing makeup related stuff - as long as that's okay with you!) chat/lesson via Skype.

Sound good?! Like the prizes? Welllllll, scroll up, click the link and go buy your tickets! You have until 3pm PST February 5th to "purchase" them/donate and forward me those emails!

Thank YOU to Maggie Bags for their generous donation!

Sans Brushes





Products used:

Eyes
Bamboom Paint - MAC
Tintoretto Paint - MAC
Fervent Pigment - Illamasqua
Great Lash Mascara in Black - Maybelline
Ombre Glace - Lancome
23L Aqua Eyes Liner - Makeup Forever

Face/Cheeks
#130 & #110 HD Foundation - Makeup Forever
Violetta Lipstick - MAC
Ombre Glace - Lancome

Lips
Pink Fuschia Lipliner - MAC
Violetta Lipstick - MAC

Monday, January 11, 2010

Idea for a raffle

I'll be posting my Charity Raffle video either tonight (depending on how late I get home from work) or tomorrow BUT I wanted your opinions on a partial prize before I record it.

Basically Maggie Bags donated a few bags for me to raffle off to raise money for charity. "Tickets" will be in the form of $2 donations (So if you donate $50 - you will have 25 entries - get it? I'll explain how that's going to work in the video BUT I'm also adding some makeup (BNIB MAC) to the prizes. Another idea I had for a prize would be this: (Unfortunately limited to NYC and the SF bay area partially) I would do your makeup (while addressing any questions you have makeup wise) and then we'd have a mini photoshoot. So you'd get your makeup done, a lesson AND professional looking (kind of - I have a PRO camera, and a pretty good eye if I do say so myself :) photos. Though if NYC it would have to be sometime february 10-24 when I'm out there. For those not living in SF or NYC, I was thinking Skype? I've never used it, but I believe it's a video phone internet type deal thing? Great description I know. :P In any case, I was thinking Skype for a more personal one on one learning session.

Thoughts? I want your feedback!

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Perception of Self

I'm definitely going to come back and continue my previous entry as it went somewhere completely different than I had intended however, I want to address the comments in this video.

I haven't read through them all yet but based on what I've read thusfar, 3 things seem to keep popping up.

1. Parents can be evil, cruel people...without even knowing it.
2. People can be evil, cruel people...some without knowing it, others fully "aware".
3. Our own minds (Ego) not can be, but IS the devil, fully conscious of it, though we are not.


Parents have good intentions. Unfortunately, by the time you are born, most have their own baggage they've been living with for years. Even if they provide you with all the basic necessities and then some that you need in order to survive in the world, the one lesson, I believe most don't teach, is one they haven't necessarily learned themselves. So how could they teach you?

I just posted a topic for discussion on my facebook page here. My last question is "What can YOU do to alter your perception of self? Do you believe you need to alter yourself to alter your perception?"

I'm not sure how deep to get with this topic because I don't want to turn anyone off but I will say this. People will always put others down. Whether it's based on appearance or something else. Age plays absolutely no factor in this. You may think "but kids! kids tend to be more cruel than adults. Even a 4 year old will call someone fat." Younger kids do not lie. They're merely observing and vocalizing what they see. Also, it's my belief that a child that young will only know the word "fat" or "ugly" because of hearing adults use it. Even if they say "Wow! That woman is big mom." - you may hear that and think "oh my god, kids don't lie" and feel bad about yourself (if of course, the statement is directed towards you) But here's the thing. YOU are the one SOLELY responsible for attaching a negative meaning onto the word. The kid may be right. They probably are. If they said it, you probably are big or fat. But who says that has to be a bad thing? Just let it be an adjective. Remove the negative meaning YOU have attached to it.

Parents, or more generally, adults, don't know everything. Their own insecurities have developed and been fostered for years. So don't allow their insecurities, or their perspective of the world to become your own. Yes, nearly all parents want what's "best" for you. But remember, their definition of "best" doesn't have to be the same as yours. They may have grown up in an era where the media portrayed "sexy" or good looking to be an overly thin body, and they bought into this idea. Allow them to have their opinions, but don't forget or feel bad about having your own that may not agree with theirs.

Also, I realize I'm only touching on physical appearance. This also applies with career, school, the way you dress, the way you talk, the way you think etc. Shira (sugarfreetv on youtube) touched on this awhile back but deleted the video. Why I don't know. But she touched on "ownership". "My" mother, "my" daughter etc Remember that no one owns you. And you own no one else. A boyfriend or girlfriend or wife or husband, mother or father etc is not your possession. Yes, until you reach a certain age, most are required to "respect" their parents wishes and abide by their rules. Understandable. But at the same time, if they want you be a doctor and you want to be an artist, do it. Be an artist. Be whatever YOU are passionate about. Speak however you want to speak. Wear whatever you want to wear. I could go on but this topic is veering off course a bit. You get my point. Hopefully.

People attack others verbally and emotionally because of their ego. Your ego is NOT you at your purest essence. A person's ego thrives on negtivity. It's a chain reaction. Someone says something mean or negative to you, and either you get emotional and/or cry, or you lash out in anger and say something back. Remember you do not own anyone else, nor are you ever responsible for anyone else's actions. Only your own. So learn to control your ego. That is what YOU can do. Learn to recognize it the second it happens. If you recognize it, you have an easier time controlling yourself. Negativity cannot be fueled without more negativity. So it's up to you to dismiss the comment and find your own inner confidence in yourself as a human being. The saying "kill 'em with kindness" - that's what they were getting at.

#3 - Our mind is the devil. The mind that you know as your mind - the obsessive one, that drives you to stress over the past or the future. That is your ego. The second you hear a little voice telling you that can't do something or telling you "that person was right, I am ugly. look at my *insert insecuritiy here*" - know that THAT is your ego.

Ever notice how when someone refers to someone as "egotistical" it's mentioned in a negative way? Well, as I said, the ego thrives off of negativity. There is a HUGE difference between cocky and confident. Cocky people are generally egotistical. Ruled by their ego. Needing to prove themselves to others and themselves. When you can reach a point where you are no longer under the rule of your ego, you can simply Be. There is no need, no desire to prove anything to anyone, including yourself. This comes when you accept yourself 100% right now, in this very moment. Yes you may have aspirations for the future, but there is no "I will be happy when..." Or "I'd be perfect if I was just 20 lbs skinnier" Learn to accept what is, with yourself and other people. When you start to hear that little negative voice, silence it. If you're outside, look up at the sky or at a tree or whatever kind of nature is around you and focus your attention on that. Are there birds? What color is the tree? What shade of blue is the sky? What do the coulds look like? I bet, it will take your attention away and make you forget the negative thoughts. if you're inside, light a candle and study the flame, the way it flickers, how high it is, just watch it and focus on that. Or focus on your breathing. Close your eyes and imagine what your body looks like on the inside as you inhale and exhale. Yes it's a form of medatation, but I'm willing to be it will center you.

Every time negativity comes to you, whether it's your own mind, or someone saying something to you, recognize it for what it is. Then, allow it to wash over you and disappear. Don't internalize it. Remember, you can only control yourself. And yourself is NOT your ego. Destroy who you have been told you are. This video i recorded awhile back somewhat relates:



I have to run but I may add more to this tonight. Normally I reread what I write before I post it, but I'm not doing so with this so my apologies if there are any typos or this doesn't make sense - my brain is all over the place at most times! :)

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Polarity & Perception

I just had a disagreement with my best friend - or rather she had one with me. There is a difference after all. I was dropping her at a friends house and asked which way she wanted me to go. She responded with "Risa, you don't know how to get there?" Of course I did. I know many ways to get to any place. I told her normally she's driving so I don't pay attention to that particular route she wanted us to take. Somehow the conversation turned to "Risa, when I ask you how to get somewhere, I ask what the best way is." I responded that "the best" way is relative to a person's definition of best. She said "Fine. The fastest." Even then, it depends on the time of day because of traffic. Then it turned to "Risa, you always have to debate and argue. You always think you're right, and I'm wrong." Which couldn't be further from the truth.

When I was little, yes, I saw a very black and white world, was extremely opinionated and argumentative. Over the years I've learned to see the various shades of gray in between however it hasn't been until recently that I've truly made an attempt to shift my own perception and do away with polarities. Good vs bad, right vs wrong etc. Because the truth is, polarities only exist if we allow them to. Perception, is everything.

I was not trying to argue nor debate. I was simply pointing out all the variables. I may not have a desire to get somewhere quickly, instead, my desire may be to take a road without a heavy flow of traffic so I have the option of driving 10-15 mph and taking notice of what I'm driving through. That may be the "best way" for me to go at that moment. As I said, perception is everything.

Growing up, my mom always took different routes to take us to school or on errands. And because of that, I know my way around nearly every neighborhood in San Francisco. Too often, I find that we (myself included) rush through life. When you focus on the destination, you miss the best and most important (IMO) part - the journey. Cliche but, true. Anything can happen in the future. We don't even know what's in store for any of us so rather than stress over something that hasn't even happened yet, focus on today. When you're so concerned about the future (or past) - both things that don't even exist; illusions - you miss out on actual Life as it's happening.

I was going to write more. I may come back and add to this, but I lost my train of thought.